Early Onset Alzheimer's - Decision to Move Husband into a Care Community

My husband was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease at age 59 and I’m sharing what it means to be a full-time caregiver for someone with this cruel disease.

Hello family and friends, 

 Just a few days ago,  I finally made decisions for Dave’s care, pieced together an update and was feeling at peace, at least, with those decisions. The decision to go into Country House hasn’t changed, I’ve just updated the timeline. Instead of starting with “day stays,” I made the decision to transition him into full-time living at Country House on 84th and Pine Lake in Lincoln. 

Thursday, I visited Country House to ask about day stays. Friday, I visited a sister location. Then, over the next 24 hours, Dave fell again, his jumbled up words were more scary for him.  He made a jerk to reach for the steering wheel on the interstate during heavy traffic when the wind was blowing semi-trucks around, and he was trying to tell me he was too warm in the car, and couldn’t get the words out and started to panic because of that. 

 The RN from Country House came over to do the required assessment on Saturday, so he could start the “day stays” at Country House this week. She was really sweet about prompting Dave for things he might be able to tell her, but he didn’t know how many sons he had, or what their names were, where he met me, or what his mom and dad’s names were.

 In short, I came to the conclusion that what he really needs right now, is to begin full time care. It’s probably a decision that could have been made a year ago, and not been too soon. His primary doctor also agreed, that this is the necessary next step in his care to keep him and us safe.

 Timeline: Monday, May 1st, I will fill out the rest of the paperwork. Tuesday, we will move his things in and set up his room. Wednesday, we will take him before lunch and the staff will be ready to help him get connected and moved in.

 We have all the required things to set up his room. Today, I will be gathering things, without him noticing, to make his room at his new home, comfortable. I don’t know what Thursday will look like, but praying for peace for all of us, and that Dave will settle in easily. Because he was so amicable with the RN who came out to do the assessment, she feels he will settle in fairly well at the stage he’s in.

 For those of you in and around Lincoln, who want to visit him, I will update this journal with his address and room info later this week. They welcome visitors, anytime. 

 Thank you for your prayers as we move forward. Thank you for all the kind messages and for the hugs, love and understanding. Thank you to everyone who has continued to “push” me to understand that I don’t have to “go this alone.”

 Dave, our boys and I, have this really magnificent cloud of loving and supportive friends and family, locally and across the globe. Honestly, it’s humbling and sometimes mind boggling, the depth of love and caring that we have around us, in our “community,” arms willing to hold us up, to hold me up. And, I hope I can return that some day. I don’t know how people get through life, without it. Thank you.

Anne Dovel