Settling my husband into the Alzheimer’s care facility

My husband was diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease at age 59 and I’m sharing what it means to be a full-time caregiver for someone with this cruel disease.

To keep this update quick and simple, I’ve copied from my Caring Bridge blog.  

   Dave has transitioned into living at the care center really well, all things considered. The boys have gone to visit frequently, as have other family members. I go once a week. He seems to recognize me, but after a few minutes gets distracted and walks off.  If you are wanting to go visit, he loves being in the courtyard. There’s a sidewalk path. Visits don’t have to be long.  The boys had been taking him for drives, but after the last time, the director suggested it may be too difficult for him and for the boys, emotionally, to go out with them. He tried to unbuckle his seat belt and get out of the car when Luke was driving and then, because he can’t verbalize what he needs, he yelled at Luke that he thought he was trying to murder him. That rattled Luke’s cage a bit, even though he understands it’s not really the dad he knows, telling him that. 

   I questioned my decision over and over, to move Dave into a care center, but after my last visit, it was clear that it really was time for skilled people to take care of him. 

   The director said Dave follows the staff around and they give him jobs to do. And he can be outside, in the courtyard, and I don’t have to worry about him wandering out to the road, or getting lost. 

   I think the boys are starting to adjust. I see a lot more smiles and less worry and tears. I’ve encouraged them to move forward and set some new goals, live their fullest lives. 

    I am sleeping back in my room again. The first 2 weeks Dave was in the residence, I felt like a spinning top, seeing all the things I had neglected over the last 2 years, inside and outside, and feeling like I needed to get everything up to snuff… now. But, I’m trying to pace myself. 

    Thank you for your continued prayers and encouragement. Dave is in a good place, being cared for by good people.